what to do if your spouse sees a divorce attorney

A divorce lawyer legally cannot represent both of you in any divorce situation. So, if your spouse asks you if you can pay half of the legal bill, you should lean towards saying no. Any lawyer that your spouse hires is professionally unable to also serve your interests.

Full Answer

What if my spouse has a divorce lawyer and I don't?

What if My Spouse Has a Divorce Lawyer and I Don't? Divorce is scary enough without your spouse’s lawyer intimidating you in court. Yet, some people choose to represent themselves in a divorce even when a spouse has hired a lawyer. You don’t need to hire an attorney simply because your spouse has one.

When to hire an attorney for a divorce case?

For example, you may be able to hire an attorney to appear with you at a court hearing or mediation only. Or, you may hire an attorney to handle one aspect of your case, such as custody, from start to finish, while you and your spouse work out property and debt division issues.

What do I need to know about divorce lawsuits?

Early in your case, your lawyer should demand any and all financial documents in your spouse's possession so that you can learn what there is between you to divide up. If you or your spouse has a pension or any kind of employee benefit, your lawyer should get a copy of the appropriate plan documents and account statements for the past few years.

What happens when you get served with divorce papers?

Getting served with divorce papers can be overwhelming and may evoke a range of emotions, from shock to sadness. Moreover, it can be embarrassing if you were served with divorce papers at work, in front of coworkers, or at home, among friends or family. As distraught as you may feel, it’s important to stay calm and read the paperwork carefully.

Can my lawyer talk to my wife?

A spouse who violates a no contact order by calling, texting, emailing, approaching or stalking the victim spouse may face jail time. An attorney can communicate on a spouse's behalf in cases where a protective order is in place. Attorneys can also help you contact a difficult spouse or their attorney.

Can you talk to your spouse during a divorce?

Legally speaking, you can have any discussions you want with your soon-to-be ex-husband or ex-wife while your case is going forward unless there is an order of protection in place prohibiting contact between the two of you.

How do you play dirty in a divorce?

Top 10 Dirtiest Divorce TricksServing Papers with the Intent to Embarrass. You're angry with your spouse, and you want to humiliate him or her. ... Taking Everything. ... Canceling Credit Cards. ... Clearing Our Your Bank Accounts. ... Starving Out the Other Spouse. ... Refusing to Cooperate. ... Jeopardizing Employment. ... Meddling in an Affair.More items...•

Does your divorce lawyer have to be local?

When it comes to legal separation and custody, having your attorney nearer is simply better. You want to make sure that the attorney you choose is local and will be available for court appearances and other legal matters whenever necessary.

What can be used against you in a divorce?

Spending marital money on extramarital affairs. Transferring marital funds to another person before a separation. Spending unreasonable amounts on business expenditures. Selling marital assets below the market value.

Should I block my husband during divorce?

The lengths to which you go to protect your privacy from your spouse during a divorce depend on your relationship. If you are going through a cordial, uncontested divorce, you might not feel blocking your spouse is necessary. However, if you two are not on good terms, consider blocking them from all your accounts.

How do you fight a narcissist in a divorce?

Divorcing a NarcissistDon't Even THINK That Your Divorce Will Be Amicable. ... Get a Strong, but Reasonable, Divorce Lawyer. ... Get a Therapist. ... Assemble Your Support Team BEFORE You Divorce. ... Get EVERYTHING in Writing! ... Stay Out of Court as Much as You Can. ... Find Ways Your Narcissistic Spouse Can “Win” ... Pick Your Battles Wisely.More items...

Why does a narcissist drag out a divorce?

Knowing that you are able to move on without their influence can be unbearable for them. They crave your dependence and loyalty above all else. Without you, they will feel the need to act in an aggressive or jealous manner. This can make a simple divorce case quickly turn into a drawn out affair.

Is furniture considered an asset in a divorce?

When household items, including your furniture, furnishings and appliances do not have a substantial value, spouses will equally divide the items based on agreed-upon method. One option is for spouses to alternate picking an item until all of the items are divided (absent personal effects).

How does mediation work in divorce?

Divorce mediation involves a neutral third party, someone who can act as a mediator as you both find mutually-beneficial solutions for your issues. The objective is to make your divorce as amicable and as cost-effective as possible.

Is it better to hire a local attorney?

Local lawyers can more effectively judge the value of your case or the likelihood of success. A local attorney knows and can fairly judge the temperament in the community and the likelihood of a fair and reasonable verdict being returned in your particular matter.

What does a mediator do in a separation?

What is the role of a mediator? A mediator provides guidance and support to a couple by walking them through any issues they may have during the separation process. The mediator is an impartial third party that helps both spouses come to a compromise.

What happens if you forget to file a divorce complaint?

If you forget to file an answer on time, your spouse may get everything requested in the complaint, such as alimony, custody, and certain items of property. Initially, you’ll want to take a couple of days to review the divorce paperwork and then decide how you want to respond.

Can you be surprised when your spouse files for divorce?

You may have seen it coming for a while, or you may be surprised when your spouse files for divorce. Getting served with divorce papers can be overwhelming and may evo ke a range of emotions, from shock to sadness. Moreover, it can be embarrassing if you were served with divorce papers at work , in front of coworkers, or at home, among friends or family.

Is it embarrassing to get divorce papers?

Moreover, it can be embarrassing if you were served with divorce papers at work, in front of coworkers, or at home, among friends or family. As distraught as you may feel, it’s important to stay calm and read the paperwork carefully. You may not understand everything in the divorce petition, but there are a few key issues to focus on ...

How long does it take for a lawyer to call you back?

If the court hands down any decisions regarding your case, your lawyer should notify you at once. Your attorney should return your calls within 24 hours unless there's some reason why that's impossible—for instance, if she's in court or in the middle of a trial.

Why can't my lawyer say when things will happen?

Maybe your lawyer can't say when things will happen because too much depends on what the other side wants; still, she should have a general idea of how the case will proceed from your side given any number of scenarios. One matrimonial lawyer tells us that clients often seek her out for a second opinion on their case.

How long does it take for a lawyer to respond to a letter?

Copies of letters should be sent to you within 24 hours of the lawyer's receipt. He or she should notify you about important phone calls—those concerning settlement proposals, for instance—as soon as possible.

What should an attorney tell you about a case?

Throughout your case, your attorney should give you some sense of whether the law supports your position. No attorney worth her weight will guarantee you a victory, but a knowledgeable lawyer should be able to tell you whether there is a basis for your position and what is likely to happen if the case is tried.

Do matrimonial lawyers seek second opinions?

One matrimonial lawyer tells us that clients often seek her out for a second opinion on their case. The most frequent complaint: their case has no direction, they see no end in sight, and it seems like they're always responding to their spouse's action with no overriding plan of their own.

Do you need an expert to testify in custody?

Maybe custody will be an issue, and you'll need an expert to testify on your behalf. In some jurisdictions, the judge will appoint an expert to report to the court, but you still might need someone to support your case. Your lawyer should start getting you the names of qualified people.

Is law a science?

The practice of law is not a science, but it's not exactly an art either. There are certain things your attorney can and should be doing. For some guidelines, refer to the following list: Your lawyer should have an overall plan for your case.

What is the most contentious aspect of divorce?

Dividing up property a couple has acquired throughout their marriage (also known as marital property) can be one of the most contentious aspects of divorce. Luckily, divorce attorneys can help alleviate some of your legal and financial stresses by advocating for a division of property that works in your favor.

Is it a good idea to have an open and frank conversation with your attorney regarding all of the property

Therefore, to ensure no property is overlooked, it is always a good idea to have an open and frank conversation with your attorney regarding all of the property and assets relevant to your case.

Is divorce exhaustive?

As you can see, the above list extensive -- yet, it is not exhaustive. Every divorce is different since every couple enters and leaves a marriage under different circumstances and with different assets. Therefore, to ensure no property is overlooked, it is always a good idea to have an open and frank conversation with your attorney regarding all ...