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May 01, 2019 · Tampa family law attorney discusses how thoughtful communication can improve your marriage. Many individuals like to believe that all marriages will be an eternal life of bliss and love, but according to the American Psychological Association half of marriages in the United States ends in divorce. According to James Sexton, author of “If You’re In My Office, It’s …
Sep 13, 2019 · How thoughtful communication can improve your marriage, according to a divorce attorney How to use these common relationship conflicts to strengthen your bond Want more tips like these?
Sep 15, 2018 · How thoughtful communication can improve your marriage, according to a divorce attorney Why this marriage counselor says a "good enough marriage" is one that lasts a lifetime Want more tips like ...
Feb 18, 2020 · How thoughtful communication can improve your marriage, according to a divorce attorney Want more tips like these? NBC News BETTER is obsessed with finding easier, healthier and smarter ways to live.
How 'thoughtful communication' can improve your marriage, according to a divorce attorneyUnderstand it's the small things that lead to major heartbreak.Use positive reinforcement.When arguing, focus on principles.Put it in an email.How to thoughtfully communicate with your partner.More Relationship Advice.May 9, 2018
Tips for improving the effectiveness of communication in your relationship:Be intentional about spending time together. ... Use more “I” statements and less “You” statements. ... Be specific. ... Avoid mind-reading. ... Express negative feelings constructively. ... Listen without being defensive. ... Freely express positive feelings.Aug 16, 2017
You avoid those traps by not talking to your spouse at all during divorce proceedings. ... Some divorcing couples try to record their conversations for possible incriminating evidence, but most lawyers recommend against it. Improper recording may create criminal liability or may not be admissible in court.
Communication in a marriage plays a much more vital role than we can fathom. It is important to open channels to have clear and meaningful communication with your spouse so that there is trust and understanding, which means a better relationship with your spouse.Mar 5, 2019
It's important that you protect yourself by knowing how to communicate with your soon-to-be ex-spouse during the course of the divorce.Where Possible, Use Email and Text. ... Immediate Replies Aren't Required. ... Stick to the Issues. ... Boundaries Are Important. ... Your Children Should Not Be Messengers or Spies.More items...•Oct 20, 2016
Keep your tone neutral, not hostile, and be brief. Do not say anymore more than you need to. Keep out the emotional content such as; I am so upset you did ___. Here are some phrases to try when solutions to the co-parenting issues are not being resolved during the conversation because of an uncooperative former spouse.
Practical Advice for Communicating During DivorceDon't communicate when you're very upset. ... Resist the urge to immediately respond every time you hear from your spouse. ... Try setting parameters relating to communications. ... Give some thought to avoiding social media while your divorce is ongoing.More items...•Feb 24, 2017
7 Steps to Understanding the Importance of Communication in a RelationshipIt Helps Strengthen Respect. ... It Takes The Guesswork Out. ... It Helps To Avoid Misunderstandings. ... It Builds Trust. ... It Lets Partners Support Each Other. ... It Helps To Grow Love Between Partners. ... It's Great For Your Mood.Feb 26, 2019
One way to understand emotional boundaries is to look at them the way you would a cookie — or anything you are temped by, says Gage.
When we stop assigning our emotions to our partner, we begin to take responsibility for how we feel, says Gage. This, in turn, leads to healthier boundaries.
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Matt Smith, a licensed therapist at ModernEra Counseling, says that few, if any, couples truly look forward to going to therapy, even when it’s needed. “Meeting with a professional can be intimidating, especially at the outset,” says Smith. “For some couples, therapy is out of the question.
Joree Rose, a licensed marriage and family therapist, says that one of the biggest challenges she sees is the disconnection between couples after years of being together, along with the distraction of kids, work, commitments and financial stressors. That’s why she recommends finding something in common to do together.
In other words, when the initial conversation or disagreement is taking place, make sure you end on a note where you feel a conclusion has been reached. The worst thing you can do is throw it back in the other person’s face every time there’s tension/frustration.
The major benefit is that it gives you a third party to help facilitate better communication, but also the chance to learn how to interact with and hear each other better. “We like to think of it as a gateway to a more positive relationship and a safe place where you share what you want in the marriage,” Frawley says.
People are often afraid to seem overly needy or demanding, so instead fall into the trap of thinking: ‘If he really loved me, he would know that I need xyz.’ The alterative, according to Frawley, is to say: ‘I need xyz.’ “Being clear about what you need and want is important ,” she says. Especially in marriage, vagueness never works. Sometimes this requires you to sort through your talking points before you approach your partner about what’s bothering you. Sometimes it’s about pressing your spouse until they tell you what they actually need. Bottom line: Just because you’re married and see each other every single day, you’re not mind readers.
An example: “Men complain that their wife doesn’t do anything other than have lunch or go to the gym or use a nanny, and we ask, ‘Does she know this is how you feel or perceive her?’” Frawley says. The relationship lesson is to speak up. “If you tell yourself something isn’t important enough to discuss and then it happens 68 times and suddenly you want to get divorced because of it, it may have been smarter to head it off at the pass.”
Pollock says: “We frequently will have clients send us correspondence—say, an email—between them and their spouse. It’s a forward with a note at the top: ‘Can you believe how outrageous this is?’ For us, because of the scope of what we see in our day to day, our response is frequently: ‘Meh. We’ve seen worse.’ But that’s the lesson: The real issue is how the person—about whom the email is being written—receives it.” She adds: “That’s why it’s so important to understand each other’s communication styles. After all, the way you interact with each other is what gives you both the power to be productive and constructive, but it’s also what gives you the power to do the most harm.”
Good communication in marriage is a must. In fact, it’s the difference between being able to survive the small stuff—like meal planning and child-pick-up—as well as the big things like financial hardship and sexual satisfaction. But according to research published in the academic journal Couple Family Pscyhology, ...
With your spouse, determine which types of decisions always require an administrative meeting first.
You need to talk to your spouse about something important. Your spouse walks in the door after a long, hard day at work. He or she may not have enough energy to handle a big conversation. He or she may even feel attacked.
If changes to “life as you know it” have caused tension in your relationship, you’re not alone. With more people staying at home and working at home, the increased time spent together can add pressure to your relationship. Anger, fear, and frustration are common feelings to experience during uncertain times such as these, and it can take a toll on your communication in marriage.
Relationships take work and care, but don’t forget to take care of yourself too. You may find that as you work to improve yourself (#personaldevelopment), you become a better communicator and a better partner to your spouse!
One of the most important things you can do for your relationship is to learn your spouse’s love language. The love languages are inspired The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman. The primary love languages are:
Have you ever stayed up late into the night talking with your spouse? Sometimes a conversation has the power to recharge your soul and rekindle your relationship. These are life-giving conversations.
At NextStep 2 Mental Health, we provide comprehensive and compassionate mental health care — and that includes couples therapy and marital counseling. Whether you’ve been struggling with multiple issues or you just can’t seem to resolve a conflict, we can help you get your relationship back on track. Give us a call at our Louisville, Kentucky office at 502-339-2442, or send us a message to request more information.
So how should a couple best deal with micro-cheating? Be honest and straightforward, says Weiss: “Micro-cheating isn’t necessarily a sign of anything except maybe that a couple needs to do a better job of communicating. And better communication can occur with or without therapeutic assistance. Open, honest, non-reactive communication is the key to healthy intimacy. The more open and honest a couple is, the more intimacy they have. Remember, with infidelity, it’s not the specific behavior, it’s the lying and secrets that drive a couple apart. If you can eliminate the lies and secrets, the relationship gets much stronger.”
Robert Weiss, LCSW, CSAT and CEO of Seeking Integrity, an online community that addresses behavioral health challenges, says the difference between micro-cheating and full-on infidelity is better defined by how much your secret interactions might affect your partner when he or she finds out.
After all, solid relationships are based on trust — and micro-cheating isn’t exactly a trustworthy behavior if you’re keeping your interactions on the downlow. “What is lost on many people who cheat is that their interpretation or rationalization of the cheating behavior does not matter, it’s the interpretation of their partner and their partner’s feelings that matter,” says Tashiro. “There’s an old saying in social psychology, ‘What’s perceived as real is real in its consequences,’ and that certainly applies to micro-cheating. When someone feels that there has been an infidelity, there is a sense that an agreed upon standard has been intentionally violated and it’s human to respond to deception with anger, distrust and loss of affection,” he says.
Weiss says it’s somewhat normal to find other people attractive within a committed relationship — just not to act on it. “Being in a relationship does not mean you never notice anyone other than your partner,” says Weiss.